Monthly Archives: April 2008

The readings…

It’s good to include readings into your wedding ceremony, whether it’s a religious or secular style of wedding doesn’t really matter. Obviously for those of specific religious beliefs who are having a traditional ceremony may not have too much choice when it comes to the wording. But for others there is a wealth of variety available.

From the classic inclusion of love poems :

Love
by Samuel Taylor Coleridge

And in Life’s noisiest hour,
There whispers still the ceaseless Love of Thee,
The heart’s Self-solace and soliloquy.
You mould my Hopes, you fashion me within ;
And to the leading Love-throb in the Heart
Thro’ all my Being, thro’ my pulse’s beat ;
You lie in all my many Thoughts, like Light,
Like the fair light of Dawn, or summer Eve
On rippling Stream, or cloud-reflecting Lake.
And looking to the Heaven, that bends above you,
How oft! I bless the Lot that made me love you.

to the unique custom written vows for a ‘haunted’ wedding in October….

Thrice the brinded cat hath mew’d.
Thrice and once the hedge-pig whined.
Harpier cries ‘Tis time, ’tis time.

Round about the cauldron go;
In the poison’d entrails throw.
Toad, that under cold stone
Days and nights has thirty-one
Swelter’d venom sleeping got,
Boil thou first i’ the charmed pot.

Double, double toil and trouble;
Fire burn, and cauldron bubble.

Then……


greet guests………

Welcome all you witches and ghouls
who have gathered here for these fools
They wish to share their immortal love with you
And pledge to always stay true


turn to father of bride….
Who unlocks the dungeon door
Has wiped away the ghastly gore
Who loves his daughter to the core
But just can’t stand her anymore…




father hands over bride…..with kiss


Now turn together so you may see

The person you promise to love for eternity

Personal vows….

Do you Jesse, King of the Porcelain Throne
promise to make Janice’s inner beauty shown
all her dreams and wishes shall be known
To take care of her forever in your home

I so promise….
Do you Janice, Dancer within the lights
promise to occasionally lose a fight
Help to answer the babies cries at night
and to make sure Jesse does what is right?



I so promise….


These rings you take are not to bind
But to show you are of like mind
To have and hold from this night on
In madness and in raging fun
Take these now and show the throng
How love of each other has made you strong.

Repeat after me…
Come one, come all as spirits roam
And witness love brought to our home
On Hallows night our vows are made
In brightest light and darkest shade
Dance madly to the sounds of ghouls
And witness once again these fools.



By power given to me today
By states of this fair USA
By those who wed and stand here now
I accept that these two made their vow
And stand before you for all to see
Husband and Wife in merry glee

Come you all to witness this
The final sealing with a kiss
In death as well as in this life
I now declare you man and wife!

Ladies, gentlemen, Witches, ghouls
I now present these merry fools!
Mr and Mrs…………..

………..the possibilities are endless.

Here’s some points to note:

  • don’t ask a soft spoken person to read
  • don’t ask a nervous person to stand up in front of a crowd
  • don’t expect a child to get it perfectly right
  • make it appropriate to the venue and theme
  • make it non-offensive to differing faiths and belief systems
  • make it truly reflect what you are trying to say to your beloved
  • use other people to read when you don’t want to say a lot yourself
  • vary the readings to include people you couldn’t fit into the wedding party
  • don’t choose a parent unless you choose them all
  • ditto for choosing children
  • don’t make them long and redundant
  • enjoy the time and pauses in the ceremony to take a breath.

Mistakes to be avoided in your wedding processional

Mistakes that can be avoided.

  • Bridesmaids being too far away. They need to stand roughly 2 feet from the bride. At one wedding outdoors the bridesmaids were about 6 feet away and weren’t in any of the pictures. This means as the officiant, I had to pause in the ceremony and ask them to move closer. The first one up, sets the spacing, make sure she knows where to stand.
  • Don’t have the rings in boxes, and don’t throw the empty box at the officiant’s feet!
  • Don’t stand with your backs to your guests, at least be facing your intended so that they can hear and see you. Light candles from behind the table, not from in front, again so that they can see and hear you.
  • Think of it as a show of a lifetime and you are the stars, they are there to SEE you.
  • Let the bridal party have copies of the processional music so that they can listen to it and get a feel for the pacing.
  • Don’t have the groom and officiant up front too soon. If it’s a long walk for the bride, get someone to cue the groom to walk to his place when she is at an optimum point in her journey so that he doesn’t have to endure the ‘standing up alone in front of all the guests who are trying to see if he is nervous’ scenario.
  • If the venue are taking care of things like the unity candles and suchlike being in place and/or lit, ready for use etc., have a member of your team go round and check that everything is a go before the bridal party start down to aisle. Many times things are overlooked at the altar in the heat of the preparations for the processional.
  • Don’t have the men all standing with their hands in front of them. Their hands naturally fall in what a professional photographer informed me is ‘the fig leaf’ position. They will be seen from the side, and a straight arm or hand in pocket looks better in the pictures.

Relax, enjoy the day, and most of all, enjoy your love!