It was a little stressful, as rehearsals tend to be. The worst mistake people make is not thinking about what they would like before they get there. Even after a lot of questions and answers, there are a lot of things to decide.
Who is in the wedding party? What’s going to happen with mom’s? How many parents are there? Do they talk to each other? Are they being escorted?
Flower girl? Ring bearer? Groomsmen, Bridesmaids? Maid of Honour?
In this case, nothing was certain. There were certainly a lot of opinions. All valid. A suggestion when planning your rehearsal. Choose who is making the decisions…bride and groom are good choices for this. For the bride…be nice! For the groom, step up, make some decisions and help out your bride!
Too much input = chaos = costs you more for my time. You get one hour.
The logistics of the venue are explored for the first time. It’s actually a good idea to visit the site a couple of times prior to the rehearsal and walk the space when it’s not costing you money to do so. Add to that the time spent for everyone else. Outdoor venue? Check where the wind comes from…it may not be the prettiest spot, but it could be the best…photos can be taken at any location.
Today’s rehearsal took almost 2 hours…so that made it 4 hours input today. Doesn’t seem like much, but it’s half a working day, flat rate payment. Not hourly. The bride and groom were charming, but that could not be said of all people. My husband was watching from the sidelines and being in a park, was not perceived as being involved. The comments from one ‘gentleman’ made his blood boil to the point of us bowing out of the planned meal afterward. This person criticized the little ‘brochures’ that I made free of charge, which explained what happens at a rehearsal and outlined the customized ceremony of the day. The same person charged off in my direction claiming that the flower girl and ring bearer should link arms to process and I was ignorant. Once he got to me, he was received with a polite ‘no’. How may I ask does the child scatter flowers whilst carrying a basket and being link armed with another? He did not retreat in his insistence. I don’t even know who this person was. I was not introduced and have no clue.
His hostility increased as the rehearsal progressed to the point of hampering the proceedings. One child was out of synch when he practised and he yelled at me for that too! I was not feeling happy when I left. Such a shame. The couple are awesome and deserve all happiness. I am determined not to let it influence me for the wedding. I felt upset mainly because I am the Minister, not a wedding planner or organizer. The officiant does not ‘plan’ the seating, the music etc…but often is expected to do all this as the officiant, but at the same charge as a JP, or much much less than a church wedding.
This ‘gentleman’ was annoyed as he expected me to organize everything..not my job unfortunately. However, I should have refused to do it, rather than my kindhearted attempt to help them out. It’s clearly stated in my contract. His challenging comments and loud criticisms threw me off my stride, I didn’t expect to get heckled. Still don’t know who he was. Then he lectured me on the wedding party being ‘not balanced’ from a photography point of view..Okay, I didn’t invite them, there were 2 groomsmen and 3 bridesmaids, how could I change that?
Tough day.
